Have no fear, everyone! Feb and I have worked things out. I was finally honest with him and told him just how much I really do care about and miss him. He has started to be more honest in conversation and to tell me how he's feeling on a regular basis.

He was scared to say how he felt because he thought he would sound stupid- you know, he left Canada, but now he says that he misses me. He thought that I would not believe him or not want to hear it when in reality, I really need to hear that. I'm not going to travel across the world for someone who doesn't make me believe that they want me to! So we are being careful to tell each other exactly what we are feeling, and it's going really well!

Being so far apart really does make it harder, though. I have decided that, if all goes well, I will head out to Foreignland again at the end of the summer. I have obligations here until that time- work, school, some volunteer stuff I do- that I really can't turn my back on, but at the end of August, I intend to go see him.

Readers, I'm so excited! And, guess what! Feb's birthday is coming up in a few days, and I bought him the coolest thing . . . a webcam! Now I know that to many of you, that is not an exciting present, but I really think he will be thrilled! You see, he has been asking me to get a webcam so that we can see each other while we talk online. In fact, he has been asking me to do that since our first separation period (when I was waiting for him to come out here) which was well over a year ago. I always said no, and I'm not really sure why. I think it is because I had weird connotations with webcams, thanks to some of the sketchy stuff that floats around on YouTube. I also like the idea that I can talk to him while I'm in my pajamas with no makeup and frizzy hair and it doesn't matter because he can't see me.

But I've realized that Feb's seen me like that before. It really doesn't matter to him if I look perfect all the time, and heaven knows that he's seen me at my worst and still wants me! I've also realized just how visual he really is. I know that guys in general are visually stimulated, and seeing things is really important for their learning and enjoyment, and maybe I'm just not aware of the extent of that, but it seems that Feb is even more visually jump-started than most guys. I mean, when I send him a simple picture of me, he can be excited about it for a week! I've decided that if it will be that exciting and wonderful for him, it really is worth it for me to cave in and get us webcam-enabled.

So, I went and bought two nice webcams and one is on its way to Foreignland as I type. The other is sitting on my computer and I have already tried it out a few times and discovered it is not as scary as I thought it would be.

Maybe, just maybe, Readers, things will be okay.